You asked for it: In which we banish Netflix and make peace with UNC football

Assistant copy editor Drew Goins (Tom Haverford meets Gordo from “Lizzie McGuire”) and assistant online editor Kelsey Weekman (any character played by Mindy Kaling) are “You Asked for It,” a weekly advice column in which the two experts give their rarely helpful advice in response to anonymous questions submitted by UNC students. Results may vary.

You: I need to study. How do I stop my Netflix problem so that I can study?

YAFI: Valid concern. Unless you’re a communication studies major, you don’t have the free time to be spending hours on Netflix. Freakin’ comm majors.

First tip: Listen to Netflix. Every time you say yes to “Are you really 100 percent sure you’re still watching ‘Breaking Bad’?”, it dies a little. It cares. So for your next flix-tervention, just say no. Go watch, like, one episode — two, max — of “Parks and Recreation” and then hit the books.

Netflix also has a new feature where you can sync with Facebook. Go ahead and do that. Every time you’re tempted to delve into your queue, think about what Aunt Brenda would think if she found out you’ve been binge-watching “Inside: Russia’s Toughest Prisons,” “The Vampire Diaries” and — inexplicably — “The Croods.”

Be careful, though. There has to be a way to disable this feature, but it’s likely hidden up in the Cloud with the UNC football team’s defense.

If the temptation is just too much, there are definitely programs out there that can temporarily block certain websites, so you can work for six minutes before pulling them up in incognito mode.

For more tips, search BuzzFeed. Try “78 Tips for Staying Focused While Studying” and then “47 Studying Fails” and then “32 Fruits That Look Like Jaden Smith” Voila! Your Netflix problem is now a BuzzFeed problem. You’re equally as distracted, but at least you know about the 59 times bacon was almost better than Beyonce.

You: What do you suggest to lower stress levels while watching UNC football and basketball games?

YAFI: Honestly, you’re never really going to have a chill UNC athletics experience. Maybe you could try sitting in the lotus position, but you’ll probably be jittering so hard you achieve lift-off.

Instead, use your non-Tar Heel sports time to cool down and find your zen. To help, we’ve compiled a list of activities less stressful than watching UNC athletics:

Dealing with flipped classrooms, staying afloat in quicksand, defusing a bomb in front of your mom, inside-out pilates, crocheting with machetes, defecting from the North Korean army, season four of “America’s Best Dance Crew,” yoga (in a prison) and yoga (in a volcano).

Also, apparently there’s a 40 percent discount for inside-out pilates in the coupon books you get in The Pit!

Just find something that works. Our diastolic blood pressure was higher than ECU’s admission rate this weekend, and we all know that’s unhealthy.