Is it cold enough for rain boots or shall I wear Chacos? — The basic rain struggle.
Can I ask my Jewish roommate if we can get a pet mini-pig? Or is that not kosher?
Tried to feed the pickles from a Chick-fil-A sandwich to a campus squirrel. Three of his buddies jumped me and took the whole sandwich. I think I saw them flashing gang signs as they retreated.
With impending midterm grades and historic flooding, I see no need to prolong evacuation.
When your teacher makes you spell your answer and you emphasize the “F - U.”
Dear Creedence Clearwater Revival, To answer your question: Yes, we have certainly seen the rain. Now, if y’all don’t mind, we would love for the Beatles to be right about the sun coming because it does feel like years since it’s been here. Sincerely, Everybody
Why does Hamilton Hall only have two elevators? Nobody has time to wait 30 minutes just to go up four floors.
I was worried about not getting enough sleep, but then I just slept through two classes — life has a way of making things work.
Remember that one time the sun was shining? It seems like a fabled dream at this point.
Why are Open Eye and Caffe Driade so far away from campus? Starbucks should take one for the team and give up their spot to someone better.
Hey Elon Musk, just invent a bed-car hybrid so I can sleep on my way to class.
Can the hurricane please bring the great flood before my exam on Monday? We really need a silver lining to all this rain.
Fetty Wap dying would really put a damper on our Spring Jubilee options.
Please refrain from asking me what I am doing after graduation.
When my roommate was worried about my daily caffeine consumption, I simply responded with my mantra: “The candle that burns twice as bright burns half as long.”
Why doesn’t UNC have a petting zoo? Think about it, students can go relax by petting an otter, horse or some other kind of furry creature. It would literally be heaven.
Send your one-to-two
sentence entries to
firstname.lastname@example.org, subject line ‘kvetch.’