Opinion: Safe spaces don’t exist

From the second we are born, we live in a state of threat or insecurity.

We can’t be sure what lies around the corner. We don’t know what events may cause emotional turmoil. The emotional abuse and physical violence some of us face can be worse than scenes from a movie. Paired with an invalidation of our lived experiences, that can cause us to seriously question ourselves and our worth.

Today, we see a proliferation of spaces constructed with those issues in mind. These spaces are meant to be safe, where visitors are heard and valued, maybe even sheltered from outside dangers.

College students have found particular uses for such spaces and have gotten creative. Sometimes these spaces have been created with fluffy pillows, calming music and even puppies.

But can we really declare that a space is safe and just expect it to be so?

There are plenty of reasons why the creation of safe spaces as a definitive solution for the problems they address doesn’t work.

For example, there’s a tendency for group meetings to be labeled as a “safe space,” followed by a facilitator’s encouragement that people should be unafraid to express themselves freely.

Even in our editorial board meetings, members with the minority opinion find it difficult to speak honestly when their words might offend or hurt other members.

Should the safe space enable those with conservative voices the freedom to speak up, or should it protect the members who have been historically silenced by those voices?

It takes effort to make a space truly safe, especially in group settings.

First, there needs to be a consensus on what constitutes safety for everyone involved. Next, there needs to be a consensus on acceptable ways of addressing missteps, ill-intentioned or not, which is easier said than done.

The word “respect,” tends to get thrown around frequently in these circles, but when people understand and define respect differently, problems arise.

Therefore, it’s necessary to lay down the expectations and be ready to reflect before labeling a space as safe. This could require a constant self-reflection of one’s own actions within and outside any collective they are a part of.

We all have different lived experiences as we come from different backgrounds. Sometimes that makes it hard for us to understand experiences different from our own.

Ideally, these experiences would be shared between people in a manner that is both respectful and productive in a safe space.

However, that forum can easily turn into a space where unfiltered expression comes at the expense of all too frequent microaggressions or watered-down hate speech. For a marginalized person, the need to validate their responses to such aggressions through articulating past negative experiences makes spaces unsafe. It can be hard to defend yourself in a space that is safe for everyone but you.

No amount of sensitivity workshops, cultural awareness lectures or puppies can guarantee a safe space for all, because universally safe spaces aren’t possible.

Safe spaces don’t exist not because they shouldn’t. They don’t exist because they can’t.