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The Daily Tar Heel
DTH at a Glance

In which I offer you a tip to help get through group projects:

Over my 15 years of school, I've been bullied, I've failed assignments and I've had breakdowns in public places. But there's not a single thing I abhor more than literally every group project I've ever been a part of — from paper mache-ing a piƱata in second grade to working at an adult-ish summer internship in college. On one occasion, my then-group had a 10-minute altercation over which preposition was more appropriate for a sentence in a blog we were writing. You know what was the most satisfying feeling in the world? Winning the argument — but also unfollowing them on Twitter the day our internship ended.

It's for this reason that my thoughts and prayers are with six individuals who recently agreed to let NASA lock them inside a giant dome to live together in isolation for a psych experiment. I truly hope on the last day, they, too, can all secretly unfollow one another on Twitter. It's one of life's simplest and shadiest pleasures.

QUICK HITS

  • Thanks to the revised "pay as you earn" program, everyone, regardless of socio-economic status, can take out loans and collectively revel in 20 to 25 years of student debt. Welcome to the party.
  • A workplace task force will be brought back due to UNC staff leaving for more lucrative positions. They'll hopefully be available to counsel student journalists soon.
  • For the first time in 60 years, UNC will play against the University of South Carolina on land that doesn't belong to either of us. Whether South Carolina will finally come up with a name that doesn't belong to us remains to be seen, though.

IN OUTER SPACE

NASA just enlisted an astrobiologist, physicist, pilot, architect, doctor, journalist and soil scientist for help. It's allegedly a psychological experiment to study group cohesion for future space missions. I'm pretty sure it's the start of a joke my creepy uncle would tell.

IN CAMPUS NEWS

Bid Day is over. We can all go home now. When it comes to being well known but almost completely not understood, Bid Day is second to none — except maybe like, the Board of Governors. But unlike our good friends at the Notorious BOG, sororities at least have cute signs and DIY T-shirts.

IN OUR OPINION

Rebel Wilson and a UNC Board of Trustees member needed to stay in their lane. We're all for humor here (clearly), but Wilson's joke at the VMAs was belittling to the problems people of color deal with every day. Columnist Gwendolyn Smith asks all of us to show some sympathy toward the trials of others, especially when we don't experience them ourselves.

IN THE BLOGS

J. Cole came home to us over the weekend. Like our collective, estranged hip-hop husband returning from war, the artist performed proudly in Fayetteville on Aug. 29 — and Cole brought a squad rivaling that Taylor Swift video. Drake was Olivia Benson from "SVU."

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