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The Daily Tar Heel
Town Talk

Will Crawl For Food: Your guide to Franklin Street's Small Plate Crawl

Is Lenoir becoming your Le-normal?

Are you feeling a little low after coming off of last weekend’s high (I’m talking about the miracle that takes place during Parents Weekend where dining hall food rises above penitentiary standards and overwhelms us all)?

Are you in the mood for something overly-pompous to yak about?

If you answered yes to any of those, and want to stop depleting your rations of Ramen faster than you can replace them, look no further than Franklin Street this week to add a healthy dash of pseudo high-class style to your life.

The Small Plate Crawl  taking place in the Chapel Hill/Carrboro/Hillsborough area this week  (Sept. 29 to Oct. 1) is one of those rare occasions where Chapel Hill transcends the bougieness  of a Portlandia episode and is guaranteed to boost your image as a gentrifying college student with a plethora of local insight.

As I’m writing this, the festivities are only just beginning, so I apologize in advance for not being able to grace you with my savvy critiques of the plates themselves. I did manage, however, to get an exclusive sneak-peak of the menu offerings  and decided to bring you my review of the most pretentious-sounding plates, with absolutely no regard for the actual ingredients. Pinkies up:

Akai Hana - Mixed Sunomono: It’s impossible to say this out loud without sounding like Nemo when he tries to say “anemone”.

City Kitchen - Fall Squash Raviolo: In order for these autumnal veggies to even be on your plate, they technically would have been harvested within the past couple of days. That’s fresh.

Fitzgerald’s - Heirloom Tomato Caprese: These priceless gems are clearly leagues above your average, ordinary tomato.

Il Palio - 500 Day Aged Prosciutto di Parma: Stress from school has probably aged me just as much.

Top of the Hill - Sliced grass-fed Harris-Robinette beef tenderloin: Beef with a backstory, what more could you want?

And possibly the best part: this event is happening rain or shine! So strap on those Bean boots and crawl down to Franklin to experience this unmatchable level of local flamboyancy.

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