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The Daily Tar Heel

Kvetching board for Oct. 24, 2014

kvetch:

v.1 (Yiddish) to complain

Irony: when the professor of Philosophy 266, Ethics of Sport, is implicated for lacking ethics of sport.

The meter is out for five minutes and I get hit with a ticket. News vans camp out on the sidewalk in front of the Old Well for a circle jerk. No problem.

To the girl in Ancient Cultures dying of pneumonia: have you ordered your SarCoughigas?

Secretaries grading student papers? I can’t get mine to even type a letter for me.

In light of Wednesday’s report, how many of those extraordinary and diverse Moreheads owe Uncle Mot a refund?

Here’s hoping that the stipend we pay our Morehead Student Body President is offsetting the cost of his books, fees, food, housing, and... oh wait.

Student Congress, take a page out of Washington’s playbook and force yourselves into government shutdown before demanding a paycheck.

To the short girl in Lenoir who gave up on the Cinnamon Toast Crunch because she couldn’t reach the dispenser: I saw your plight and I sympathized, but you didn’t have to settle for Rice Krispies — there was more CTC to your right.

I treat math majors like human calculators and English majors like human dictionaries. Whoops.

You’d think that after 4 years at UNC I’d know better than to try and abbreviate “analysis” into 4 letters.

To The Daily Tar Heel’s cartoon team: Would you please drop by the Carolina Crossroads Bar to toast your many predecessors? The spirits of MacNelly, Branch, and others just might provide some needed inspiration.

Registering for your last semester senior year: it’s shocking how much of my search is fueled by the question “What do I NOT want to take the least?”

Being in a car does not make you invisible. This PSA brought to you by otherwise attractive girl picking her nose.

You don’t know awkward until you’ve made eye contact with a guy in the restroom... the women’s restroom.

When Gov. McCrory spoke at University Day I made sure to maximize my use of eye rolls.

To my orgo professor: can the lyrics to Taylor Swift’s new song be a question on the test tomorrow? That is the only thing I have truly memorized while studying for this test.

Send your one-to-two ? sentence entries to ?opinion@dailytarheel.com, subject line ‘kvetch.’

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