The Daily Tar Heel

Serving the students and the University community since 1893

Wednesday May 25th

Kvetching board for Jan. 15

kvetch: v.1 (Yiddish) to complain

Dear hipsters: Why do you pay so much money to look poor?

To the P2P guy who was so drunk that he started hitting on himself in the mirror: Enough said.

@UNCBasketballPlayers: A little less tweeting, a little more practice.

DTH weather forecasters: 41 degrees and 21 degrees are well below “average,” much like your readership.

My SOCI 101 class started with a reading about how terrible SOCI 101 classes are. This won’t end well.

To the man-child next to me in the black loafers and white high socks on your Game Boy: You don’t have to pound the wall every time Pikachu dies.

This no-texting-while-driving thing is really cramping my style. At least I can still pick my nose and drive.

Dear Lenoir: After successfully sneaking into you for the first time this semester, all I want to do is sneak back out.

To the person who left the unopened BSkis bag on the P2P Sunday evening: Thank you. You provided three friends some good midnight snacking.

To the girl running up the down escalator in Lenoir: I’m sure the cookie was worth it.

In response to the e-mail sent to students about updating registration info: Why would I need to update my ethnicity?

Dear mystery hot girl from CHEM 102: You are so beautiful and so very, very stupid.

To the worker at Top of Lenoir who pulled out a fat stack of cash and started counting it: Why are you still working there?

Dear girl in the Union shamelessly eavesdropping on our conversation about kvetches: Congratulations, you’re in one.

To the random guy in the cafeteria who aimed and pretended to shoot me with his banana: Thank you. I feel loved. Should I play dead now?

To the beautiful, smart girl on the fourth floor of Davis: You are perfect. But please, stop eating Lunchables.


Send your one-to-two sentence entries to dthedit@gmail.com, subject line ‘kvetch.’

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