QuickHits for April 13, 2010

Justice Stevens
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Venerable Supreme Court Justice John Paul Stevens announced he is retiring at the end of the term.   With Stevens gone, Obama must keep in mind the importance of keeping a bow tie seat on the bench.

Palin/Bachmann
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Sarah Palin and the equally kooky Michele Bachmann appeared together at a rally in Minneapolis. Talk about a dream ticket in 2012.  With them in charge, small government suddenly sounds very appealing.     

Spring football
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In probably the most anticipated game on ESPN ever, the UNC blue team took on the white team in the spring game.   The game’s motto: Spring football … because we can’t forget about basketball soon enough.

Dow Jones
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The stock index has peaked over 11,000.  This surge is the first time the Dow closed above 11,000 since the financial turmoil of 2008. The Dow’s as high as the bankers were  who thought they could control risk and not screw us all.

Tiger Woods
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Woods returned to the sport last week, finishing fourth at the Masters. His game was solid, but  he just couldn’t exercise enough club control, and he kept getting stuck in the bushes. Sport certainly has a way of imitating life.

Ed Davis
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UNC big man Ed Davis announced he will enter the NBA draft after two years in school.  Thanks a  lot, Ed.  We know this year’s team got used to losing, but  the season is over. Haven’t we lost enough already!?