v.1 (Yiddish) to complain
To the drunk man on the J Bus at 9 a.m. that asked if the next stop was Wine Street and Colombia Liquor: I guess it is never too early for Thirsty Thursday?
The UNC backcourt got a B on the DTH midseason report card? I guess grade inflation really is a problem around here.
Hey, you guys writing those terrible parody letters about gendered language: Please stop, you’re making the rest of us look bad.
I don’t see what all this debate is about. Women are the first thing I think of when I hear the word “freshman.”
Kildare’s bouncer: The smiley face you drew on my hand last Saturday won’t quit. Please switch to Crayola so my professors think I spend my weeknights studying (and showering). Sincerely, a second-semester senior.
To all my new friends in Rams working on their New Year’s resolutions, save us both two weeks of frustration and just give up now.
DTH: can you please block “Mystic” and “Joe Mama” from commenting on Every. Single. Article. Ever?
It seems that after a few weeks away people need a reminder of basic library etiquette: No phone calls, Skype dates, loud music or passionate arguments. Please kindly learn some respect.
Dear UNC Bell Tower: You’re 8 minutes slow. Stop living in the past.
Dear frat boys: It doesn’t appear that your Sperrys give you much traction, though I must say I’ve enjoyed watching you traipse over icy patches like ballerinas today.
To the girl on the bus who thought that classes were canceled from 5 p.m. to 11 a.m. for the Alabama/Oregon game: SPOILER ALERT: You go to UNC.
Dear DTH: After all the coverage you gave the NCAA scandal, you could at least give the bowl game win more than the bottom of the back page.
To “553 Drew,” the anonymous swipes you left at Lenoir will go down as the single greatest humanitarian act of our lifetime.
Guy in ENST 201: Your farts smell like Taco Bell. I’m not sure whether to be disgusted or impressed.
Dear Rick Ingram, holding off your public campaign until it’s legal may actually land you some positive coverage in the DTH.
To the Asian guy in Davis watching a video on how to put on a condom: Maybe you shouldn’t be risking procreation?
After a week of skating around campus sidewalks, I’m ready for club hockey tryouts.
To Connect Carolina: Yes I would like to log out, YES I’m sure, I hate you.
Send your one-to-two sentence entries to email@example.com, subject line ‘kvetch.’
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