v.1 (Yiddish) to complain
To the girl violently scratching her crotch in the UL: Take a bath or something.
To the guy blowing chunks in Davis on Sunday morning: You are doing college right.
To the liberal arts majors complaining about Gov. McCrory’s comments: Instead of listing the supposed benefits of a liberal arts education, why not back it up with facts? Oh wait, that requires research…
UNC SBP races: Where the platforms are made up and endorsements don’t matter.
Dear pedestrians: At crosswalks, you have the right of way, not the right to be a moron. Sincerely, You Will End Up Under My Car.
It’s 70 degrees out — Quick! All of Chapel Hill go for a run!
The KD Shamrock ‘n’ Run: Because who doesn’t love exercising with 200 sorority girls cheering you on?
To the guy crop dusting in the SRC: I smell what you’re doing here. You’re not fooling anyone.
To my PHIL 101 instructor talking about cell biology: Bro, do you even science?
Is it just me or has the weather this week been just about as inconsistent as our basketball team?
To the pretty blue-eyed boy who came to my register at Student Stores: I’d check you out any day.
Alert Carolina: Thanks for letting me know there’s a thunderstorm while it’s storming.
I went to the gym for my resolution but stayed to watch the boys doing squats.
To the girl walking to the dorms, crying on the phone: I’m sad it’s Monday too, but everything will be OK.
To Gov. Pat McCrory: Don’t be mad just because you got rejected from UNC…
To people knocking on my door for SBP signatures: Ask me again, ask me again! I dare you. I double-dare you!
You’d think that after years of Late Night, Roy would know when to call a time out.
To the people in chem lab talking about dragons and World of Warcraft: Way to set the stereotype.
Oh the irony of rock salt on the sidewalks of a 70 degree day.
To the girls who go out just to capture a new Tar Heel make out: Sorry you don’t have a life, but please leave the rest of us to live ours.
To the guy who looks like Ryan Gosling in the class before mine: If you say, “Hey girl,” I’m yours.
To the guy using his outside voice in the library: You’re not getting the normal looks for being so loud only because you have a British accent. Don’t abuse it, mate.
Send your one-to-two sentence entries to firstname.lastname@example.org, subject line ‘kvetch.’
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