Kvetching board for January 10, 2014

kvetch:
v.1 (Yiddish) to complain

Next time someone asks me what I’m doing after I graduate I’m going to respond with “When was your last bowel movement?” So we can both feel unaccomplished and uncomfortable.

I suppose you really deserve straight As this semester if you can figure out how to unfreeze the Old Well and actually get your sip of water…

Dear professors…please learn how to pronounce “Sakai.” Saw-kye, Sah-kay, Sah-ki, and that’s just in my three classes today.

Nothing says syllabus week more than the faint smell of last night’s liquor across an entire lecture hall.

“It’ll all blow over soon,” you said. “I’ll be playing by November,” you said. #P.J.YaDoneGoofed

To the girl sitting in front of me at the Miami game: Sorry you couldn’t handle my outbursts…I was just as surprised by the noises that came out of my mouth.

Forget North Korea, UNC’s basketball players are the ones really in need of Dennis Rodman’s charity work.

One thing I learned from last semester: The girl I befriended because I thought I liked her brother is actually really awesome! And her brother is a douche.

Our basketball team is about as inconsistent as the weather in North Carolina.

I’m a second semester senior and I think I’m seriously considering taking 18 hours this semester. I feel like I’m doing something wrong?

To the owner of Toppers — don’t we all know that Gumby’s was the one that went out on top?

To the freshmen meatheads racing each other at full sprint during LFIT warm-ups: Take off your letterman jackets and get a life.

To everyone kvetching about their roommates — I dare you to try and be more passive aggressive.

Getting called on in a class you’re in the middle of dropping online? No shits given. #seniorstatus

The only vortex worse than the ride at the fair is the one that turns your perspiration into ice.

For many UNC natives, the dream of finally catching the elusive 4.0 has been put on hold due to their homeland’s frozen watering hole.

Is it just me, or does Kennedy Meeks look like his face is made out of Play-Doh?

Can we have one big community table in lower Lenoir for all the people sitting alone? Not tryin’ to stigmatize, but damn it’s too cold to sit outside.

To the UNC cashier lady wearing a Duke shirt onto campus: Shame on you.

Send your one-to-two sentence entries to opinion@dailytarheel.com, subject line ‘kvetch.’