The Daily Tar Heel

Serving the students and the University community since 1893

Monday January 24th

Quick hits for Nov. 10, 2016

Four years

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We are going to need a hell of a lot more than four beers to survive the coming four years. We encourage everyone to be vocal and to seek help whenever needed. Alcohol might seem like a way to cope today, but ultimately taking care of one another is the best way to weather this nightmare together.


Be kind

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This up thumb goes to all the mental health advocates, those staffing suicide hotlines and all those helping Americans right now. You deserve much, much more than a cartoon thumbs-up, but this is all we have right now. This new president probably won’t give you any credit, but we love and support you.


Jesus, that hippie?

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Hi Evangelical Trump supporters, how are you? Does it feel good to transition from one savior to another? We mean Jesus was just some peace-loving hippie — following him was a lot of work. Your new savior allows you to express the vile hate and meanness you have kept bottled up for all these years. Congrats.


Sad McCrory

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While this election cycle was awful, at least the wicked witch of North Carolina is dead. Pat, can we call you Pat now? We hope you know that Republicans won a lot of this state, and you most likely didn’t. That goes to show the people don’t really dislike your policies — they just dislike you. So long, friend.


Hurt, but still here

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Writing jokes right now is hard. We don’t really have the snarky, irreverent tone we normally do. Rest assured, the quick hits section will continue to crack jokes at Donald’s expense as we distance ourselves from election day. We are just not really feeling in a comedy mood right this moment. It will come back soon.


Not out yet

The great balance right now: coping with everything while remaining positive. Our situation looks bleak right now, and we are greatly worried for many minority communities in this nation. But all the advocates for equality, Clinton and justice are still here. That has to count for quite a lot. 

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