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Here are some things that lasted longer than Grayson Allen's trippy indefinite suspension

Grayson Allen (3) reacts during the final seconds of a game. 

Grayson Allen (3) reacts during the final seconds of a game. 

Grayson Allen, a Duke Men's Basketball player, was suspended by Mike Krzyzewski  "indefinitely" for being caught tripping an opponent for the third time since last year. However, this suspension only lasted for one game (which they lost). 

This has resulted in rising concerns about the Duke community — do they know what "indefinite" means? I went to for them to provide a basic definition, you know, for next time.



1. not definite; without fixed or specified limit; unlimited:

an indefinite number.

2. not clearly defined or determined; not precise or exact:

an indefinite boundary; an indefinite date in the future.

So, in light of our hatred for the worst team in the world being so lenient with the childish actions of one of their "star" players, I’ve comprised a very accurate and short (much like his "indefinite" suspension) list of things that last a longer time than Grayson Allen’s suspension:

1. The drive to Duke

2. First Day of Classes (or FDOC

3. My hangover on New Years Day

4. Getting a drink at Starbucks

5. The Bee Movie (is this still funny to people?) 

6. Waiting for an STD test to come back #negative #checkyoself

7. The time it took for the Elon basketball player, Steven Santa Ana, to get back up after falling

8. My phone battery’s life

9. The time it takes for Chipotle to run through you

10. The time it takes for nail polish to dry

11. Amazon Prime shipping time 

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12. A cold

13. Forever 21’s return policy 

14. R Kelly’s rap opera, "Trapped in the Closet" 

15. Kim Kardashian’s absence from social media

16. A menstrual cycle

17. The time it takes to swipe left on everyone on Tinder

18. Kanye’s album, "The Life of Pablo" 

19. One episode of "Westworld"

20. Doing laundry

21. The time it took for Grayson Allen to apologize

22. The average lifespan of a house fly 

23. Formal recruitment for Greek life 

24. The time it takes North Carolina to clear snow (I’m a New Yorker, so it’s pretty slow for me).

25. The walking time from South to North campus