Good morning!
Unfortunately, I am entirely anecdoted out this morning, though not for the same reason as before. This time, it's because I used up literally all the childhood stories I have on call in a personal essay today. It's on grappling with not feeling "queer enough" — check it out when you have a few minutes.
This is my very last piece I'll ever write for The Daily Tar Heel, and I'm feeling some type of way right now. Take it easy on me today, y'all.
— Danny
QUICK HITS
- Speaking of some dope work from graduating seniors, check out today's big piece on how the NCAA institutionally failed at catching athletic scandals like UNC's.
- The Arabic program held its first-ever cooking competition Monday night, pitting 17 students against one another for bragging rights. The cooking training they received was given entirely in Arabic during class.
- In fake friends: Joel Berry, Theo Pinson and Tony Bradley have all officially declared for the 2017 NBA Draft, and I think we all feel personally slighted.
IN DAILY CRIME
Someone was reported for trying to use $46 worth of fake movie money at Circle K. Another person caused a disturbance at Pizzeria Mercato at 7 p.m. on a Thursday.
IN LOCAL BARS
Matt Damon and Ben Afleck are coming to Franklin Street via the invite of Mindy Kaling! OK, that was complete click bait. LAB! Theater will be putting on Kaling's fanfic play "Matt & Ben" this week at Might as Well.
IN "SPORTS"
The world is coming to an end, and "esports" are actually being considered for the 2020 Summer Olympics in Tokyo. We asked the eSports club at UNC what they thought of this sign of the impending heat death of the universe.
IN SAGE ADVICE
Seniors, don't forget to hit up Campus Health and/or use your student health insurance while you still can. It can be a huge help for women and people of marginalized identities, especially.
To get the day's news and headlines in your inbox each morning, sign up for our email newsletters.
