In honor of the fast-approaching All Hallow’s Eve, The Daily Tar Heel is suggesting some costume ideas to the candidates of North Carolina’s mid-term elections.
ELAINE MARSHALL:
The Democratic Senate candidate Elaine Marshall is a sweet-looking yet tough lady — kind of like Ginger Spice. You might remember Ginger from 1997 when Spice World was all the sensation and the ‘spice ladies’ were touring the world.
All Marshall needs to complete her costume are a few well-placed highlights, go-go boots and a Union Jack dress.
Since Marshall is, after all, running for the U.S. Senate, the flag might have to be exchanged for the stars and stripes.
We understand.
RICHARD BURR:
Republican Senate candidate Richard Burr is your All-American guy.
Healthy tan, dark hair — we considered John F. Kennedy but realized that he wouldn’t need to acquire a costume to be a fellow politician.
So, if you can’t be JFK, what should you be? Lady Gaga, of course!
Burr is going to have to work the hardest to get his costume together, but we think it will pay off in the end.
A wig, heavy make-up and an outfit of his choice — as long as it’s tight and outlandish.
DAVID PRICE:
Despite Democratic Congressional candidate David Price’s uncanny resemblance to Dick Cheney, ultimately, we believe he should choose Zoolander for his costume.
Price is fairly consistent when it comes to his poses in pictures — either somber smile or mouth awkwardly agape. It’s time to try a new look. Get this man a skin-tight suit, make him pucker and roll film.
B.J. LAWSON:
Republican Congressional candidate B.J. Lawson’s hair is so perfectly parted that it was too hard to resist the temptation to suggest Beaver from the 1950’s comedy, “Leave It to Beaver.”
So we didn’t.
In order to get ready for the 31st, all Lawson has to do is get a button-down collared shirt (shouldn’t be hard) and high-waisted khakis (also shouldn’t be that hard).
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