Finals Week is absolute hell at this University, but it sure is an experience. In a way, surviving finals is like my time to prove to myself that I’m tough enough to attend school here in the first place. But that doesn’t mean that I won’t eat and cry my way through the entire thing, because I will.
Like a right proper adult.
Seeing people make the completely-nude midnight run through Davis and into the UL on LDOC is obviously the beginning of the fun (and, also, of the supremely confusing Snapchat stories). I’ve seen many beautiful things in my lifetime—the way the quad looks during the spring, those videos where dogs react to their owners returning from war, Beyonce’s visual album “Lemonade”—but no sight has ever been quite as magical as watching as 100+ people stand buck-naked amongst walls and walls of books, proudly swaying in a circle and singing “Hark the Sound.”
Then the evening’s activities will start to kick in (and of course by “evening”, I mean three in the afternoon immediately after people get out of classes). Hundreds of ~mysterious~ trash bags will suddenly surround buildings near campus like the Great Wall of Frat Court, and the area’s ABC stores will oddly be out of stock for the next week. Insanity will begin. Students will go wild with freedom. About 12 hours of debaucherous activity will ensue.
And then, the Thursday morning regret will hit at least 90% of UNC’s student population like a ton of bricks.
As everyone recovers, the reality of the situation will set in. You’ll realize that your most difficult final is actually on Friday when you could have sworn you had at least until Monday, and your karma from failing to attend class after the first week of the semester will finally catch up with you. If you haven’t called home to mommy yet this year, get her on speed-dial now. In fact, just put her on hold so that you can have her available 24/7 for the next week.
And while you’re at it, go ahead and have her send you your favorite stuffed animal and your old baby binky.
You’ll be needing them.
At last, the fated hour of finals will arrive. You’ll get to class at 8 a.m. exhausted, because you probably haven’t slept in over 72 hours. You’ll stumble on a few questions here and there, but in the end you’ll almost certainly realize that you know more than you thought you did. After all, you got into this school for a reason, so chances are you will probably be okay.
And then, just when you feel like all hope is lost, you’ll come out on the other side of the tunnel and finally wrap yourself in the soft, plushy blanket that is summer vacation.
We are so close, Heels. We are so close to sweet, sweet release. But first, we must rally together in the UL and Davis Library, filling our bodies with Pit Stop snacks and soon-to-be-gone Daily Grind coffee, and make it through one last week of torture.
Stay strong, my friends. Stay strong.
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