Canada gets a new PM
After a campaign lasting three whole months, liberal Justin Trudeau won by a landslide on Monday to become Canada’s new prime minister. Meanwhile, Hillary has been running since about 2008 for an election that’s more than a year away. #makessense
Paul Ryan is the only candidate for Speaker of the House
The republican representative from Wisconsin said he will only serve as speaker if all three Republican caucuses unite behind him. He secured two out of three, with the Freedom Caucus holding out, so that’s almost the same. Ryan also wants more time with his family and provisions to make it harder to overthrow the speaker. Well, I’d like world peace and harsher punishment for parole violators, Stan, but you can’t always get what you want.
Hillary Testifies on Benghazi
It’s the story that never goes away. As Bernie Sanders put it, “America is sick and tired of hearing about your damn emails.” But apparently the House-Select Committee on Benghazi is still decently interested, because Clinton was questioned for more than 11 hours on Thursday. Here are the highlights, including that time when Committee Chairman Trey Gowdy said that he hadn’t learned many new things in those 11 HOURS.
CIA director’s email account hacked
Dear government, have you learned nothing about private email accounts? CIA director John Brennan’s AOL account got hacked by a high school student who self-identifies as stoner. Isn’t that the most comforting thing you’ve ever heard? Cue WikiLeaks becoming relevant again as they published the emails. For me, the most shocking part of this whole story is that AOL still exists.
Putin: hangs out with Syrian president and approval rating spikes
Russian President Vladimir Putin had a surprise meeting with Syrian President Bashar Assad Tuesday. The meeting was Assad’s first foreign visit since the start of the Syrian civil war in 2011, which has killed an estimated 250,000 people and caused a massive wave of migration to Europe. In other news, Putin’s approval rate hit a record high of almost 90 percent in a state-run poll that I’m sure he had no control over. Because 91 percent would have been borderline unbelievable.
Jim Webb and Lincoln Chafee (who?) drop out of presidential race
Those candidates whose names you never learned? Now you don’t have to learn them. (However, former Virginia Senator Jim Webb said Tuesday he might consider running as an independent.) Also, Joe Biden, who was never a candidate, is now officially still not a candidate.
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