Choice means acting based on your own ideals and judgment

I remember when I found out that my sister was pregnant. My little sister.

My dad called me at school on a Saturday afternoon and told me that he had some interesting news. I was intrigued, but I assumed that it was nothing more than some piece of hometown gossip.

He said, "Well, you're going to be an aunt." And in quintessential Emily fashion, I said, "Oh my God! You guys got a puppy?!" Needless to say, it came as quite a shock.

I remember being furious. Not angry that she was pregnant, but angry that she got pregnant. She is an intelligent, independent and informed young woman. How in the world could she possibly put all that in jeopardy?

Because life happens.

A major problem I have with the anti-choice argument is that it often does not take that basic principle into account.

The most morally and psychologically demanding decisions that define society today are not black-and-white issues. They are not, as some conservative minds would have you believe, questions of whether or not you are a moral person.

They are questions about whether or not you are a person at all. Whether or not you go out into the world and interact. They stem from that vast gray area that lies between left and right, liberal and conservative, religious and secular.

When I discovered that my sister was pregnant, she was three months along and had decided, after much deliberation, that she would bring her pregnancy to term.

She was 20 years old, unmarried and working part-time. Even before pregnancy, she was in a situation not unlike that of many 20-year-olds, standing at a crossroads and debating the course of her life.

Except now her load was tenfold. It was a hard load for me to swallow.

This was when the deep convictions of my pro-choice beliefs hit me in the face. The movement believes not only that it is critical to support a woman's right to a safe and accessible abortion but also that it is infinitely as paramount to support her decision to become a mother.

One of the key tenets of the pro-choice movement - every child wanted, every mother ready - had never rung more true for me.

My sister believed in her heart that what was right for her was to bring a child into the world. She came to this decision of her own free will, in complete confidence and without judgment, which is how it should be.

If she had opted for an alternative, be it an adoption or an abortion, the circumstances surrounding her decision should have been identical.

Pro-choice is pro-life. It is pro-women, pro-child and pro-family. It insinuates that anyone capable of becoming pregnant is also capable of making a moral decision that will affect the outcome of her entire life. She should be allowed to make that decision based upon her own moral and spiritual convictions, in privacy and in her own time.

By possessing the right to choose, a right protected by the U.S. Constitution, a woman retains the right to bodily autonomy - and, inherently, to the pursuit of happiness, because she is allowed to control her own destiny.

Behind every choice is a story, and each story has a different ending. Women's lives, their situations and their decisions should be valued.

Being pro-choice isn't about debating when life begins. It's about allowing every mother to make that decision for herself.

The circumstances behind each situation will never be consistent - and therefore, the means to address them cannot be either. Consistency should be found in the compassion with which people are treated, the freedoms they are granted and the respect they deserve.

The pro-choice movement would argue that the only way to address a decision that deeply divides so many people would be to allow individuals to act accordingly, as individuals.

No one should tell you what to do.

No one should push his or her own agendas, morals or standards onto others.

No one should be forced into any situation, be it sex, pregnancy or abortion.

My sister's situation allowed her to act according to her own convictions, standing in judgment of no one but herself.

We all deserve that choice.

Contact Emily Batchelder at ebatchel@email.unc.edu.