Don't give in to exam-time guilt trips

Amy Dunn, a former newspaper journalist turned stay-at-home parent, blogs regularly about living well on less at www.ourfrugaljourney.com.

College exam time is around the corner. That can only mean that it's time for the "guilt letters" to start arriving in the mailbox.

In fact, I got one last week. I'm paraphrasing here, but they all go something like this:

Exam time will be here before you know it. We know that as a loving and caring parent, you'd like to help your student get through this rough time. And we'll make it easy for you by sending your student a care packages filled with healthy snacks and convenience foods for the extremely low price of $XX.99. Blah, blah, blah.

Forgive me for not running to my wallet and whipping out the credit card. As the parent of one Carolina senior and a sophomore at Appalachian, I've gotten far too many versions of this letter over the last four years. A welcome to campus care package, Halloween care package, winter exams, spring exams, etc., etc.

There seems to be no end to the opportunities for which you can spend big bucks to send your kid a few bags of microwave popcorn, some mac-and-cheese packets and a bag of Skittles.

OK, so I'm exaggerating a bit here. They'll be happy to throw in a stress ball, an inspirational booklet and a juice pouch.

They always come in official-looking envelopes that make you think they come from the university. Since they have never lasted longer than 45 seconds in my house before they hit the trash can, I can't say for sure if they do or not.

What I do know is that someone is making some money on these things by playing on parental guilt. And that just kind of rubs me the wrong way.

But even if it didn't rub me the wrong way, my boys both know they will never be on the receiving end of one of these official care packages because I am way too cheap/frugal/thrifty (take your pick) to send one.

I have, however, made my own college care packages. My guys have come to expect a "goody bag" loaded with my latest shopping bargains each time they come home.

Here are a few tips for assembling a Do-It-Yourself care package that will give your kid his favorites and give your wallet a break:

1. Check your pantry. If you've got a box of Pop Tarts on the shelf, for instance, reserve a foil package for your college student. Extra cereal bars? Stash them.

2. Once you've shopped your pantry, keep the care package in mind the next time you hit the grocery store. Pick up a few items there, taking advantage of store sales and any coupons you might have.

3. Think light. If you have to ship it, select items that don't weigh very much. Ramen noodles and mac-and-cheese cups are ideal. Hot cocoa mixes, granola bars, candy and gum are also good choices.

4. Skip the stress balls and inspirational messages. Your kid wants food. If you want to add something, tuck in a gift card to the closest eating establishment off campus. A few bucks cash will do nicely, too.

5. Procrastinators pay more. If you must ship, don't wait until two days before finals begin. Ship early to take advantage of cheaper rates.

6. Take advantage of this FREE one-day shipping offer: If your student is coming home for Thanksgiving, have the care package sealed in a box or bag and send it back with him. Best Black Friday deal you’ll find.

7. Relax. Aren’t you glad you aren’t taking final exams? And don't stress over your kid opening his/her box before finals begin. Not your problem. He/She is an adult now. Remember?