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Once every semester, Diversions brings you a celebration of local music in the form of a free show at the Local 506. This Saturday marks the ninth Dive Party — and our best yet. The gathering will highlight some of the best bands the Triangle’s growing music scene has to offer. In preparation for the impending fun, Dive’s Linnie Greene and Joseph Chapman sent out a questionnaire for the bands. These are their responses.

Spider Bags

1. If your band was a book, which book would it be (and by whom)?

“How To Know Higher Worlds” by Rudolph Stiener

2. Four Loko ban: for or against?

That’s tough.  A lot of liquor companies make money marketing shitty cheap products to poor people and alcoholics. They don’t sell Four Loko at the country club.  At the same time, where do you draw the line?  Mad Dog has been poisoning alcoholics for years. I’ve had a lot of Mad Dog; I don’t drink it anymore because it sucks.  Four Loko sucks. I don’t need the government’s help in figuring that out, and I don’t want the responsibility of telling someone they can’t drink hyper-caffeinated malt liquor if they want to.  If people didn’t buy Four Loko, it wouldn’t exist. God bless America.   

3. What’s your spirit animal and why?

A horse with head of Abraham Lincoln.  A centaur Abraham Lincoln.  It came to me once in a vision.

4. If you could go back in time and open for any band, which would it be (and why)?

Captain Beefheart and the Magic Band.  Never got to see them.  Would have been fun. I love the Captain.

5. If you could play a gig anywhere, at any point in history, where and when would it be?

The restaurant at the end of the universe.

6. Pick one and explain: Harry Potter, Twilight or the Lord of the Rings?

Lord of the Rings.  I like Orks.   

7. What three adjectives do you hope people use the most about your band after Dive party?

Happy, psychedelic, warm.

8. If your band was a WWE Wrestler, what would your alter ego be?

When I was young, my dad and I would pass the WWF headquarters on our way from Jersey to Connecticut to visit family for the holidays.  You could see the logo on the top floor of the building from the highway.  I always asked him to stop so I could meet Rowdy Roddy Piper. I thought all the wrestlers would be hanging around in there all time, lifting weights listening to rock records. Figured it’d be a lot of fun.  We’d never stop; my dad knew better.  I took the train up there one time by myself when I was supposed to be at school.  I was 9.  I got to the building and asked the security guard where Piper was.  “Where are your parents?” he said. “Macho man Randy Savage?” I said.  He gave me a WWF wristband and told me to beat it.  It was a long train ride home.  The school had called my parents wondering where I was.  I told them I’d been to the beach to play skeeball. I lost the wristband in a card game a couple weeks later.  My alter ego would be myself at that age right before I walked into the WWF building and had my heart broken.

9. When you’re wildly famous, what crazy rumor do you hope someone spreads about your band?

Pythons in our trousers.

10. On a scale of 1 — 1,000 (1,000 being a religious experience), where will this semester’s Dive Party rank?

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1001.


Spider Bags released its single “Take It Easy Tonite” last October. Courtesy of Churchkey Records/Spider Bags

Bellafea

Bellafea combines swirling, textured compositions with gritty rock.Courtesy of david Winton

1. If your band was a book, which book would it be (and by whom)?

It would be a Choose-Your-Own-Adventure picture book, stained with coffee and held together with duct tape, co-written by Dorothy, The Tin Man and Toto.

2. Four Loko ban: for or against?

I’m drinking one right now. Just kidding. Sounds ridiculous. For.

3. What’s your spirit animal and why?

A seal. If I were to pomade my hair slicked back, you might begin to understand.

4. If you could go back in time and open for any band, which would it be (and why)?

The Bee Gees.

5. If you could play a gig anywhere, at any point in history, where and when would it be?

Playing an intimate show to some dinosaurs in present-day New Zealand sounds dangerously fun.

6. Pick one and explain: Harry Potter, Twilight or the Lord of the Rings?

Lord of the Rings has the best costumes.

7. What three adjectives do you hope people use the most about your band after Dive party?

I don’t know what to say here. What I will say is that we should celebrate our 10-year anniversary as a band with Dive!

8. If your band was a WWE Wrestler, what would your alter ego be?

He’s technically not a WWE wrestler, but we’d be Jimmy “Super Fly” Snuka. And, no, I can’t explain it.

9. When you’re wildly famous, what crazy rumor do you hope someone spreads about your band?

That our “lost album” is titled Pistachio Grove, inspired solely by pistachios and the Doobie Brothers.

10. On a scale of 1 — 1,000 (1,000 being a religious experience), where will this semester’s Dive Party rank?

No numbers, just letters: L-O-U-D.

Whatever Brains

Raleigh’s Whatever Brains brings the rock ‘n’ roll ruckus to Dive party. Courtesy of Funny/Not Funny Records

1. If your band was a book, which book would it be (and by whom)?

“Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban” by Jo Rowling

2. Four Loko ban: for or against?

?
3. What’s your spirit animal and why?

A baby human. The coolness.

4. If you could go back in time and open for any band, which would it be (and why)?

The Shaggs. We’re kindred.

5. If you could play a gig anywhere, at any point in history, where and when would it be?

Flag or The Dead, peak periods, wherever.

6. Pick one and explain: Harry Potter, Twilight or the Lord of the Rings?

Potter. The coolness.

7. What three adjectives do you hope people use the most about your band after Dive party?

Knee-slapping, ass-slapping, funky

8. If your band was a WWE Wrestler, what would your alter ego be?

Chyna

9. When you’re wildly famous, what crazy rumor do you hope someone spreads about your band?

Whatever Brains is Bad Brains in white face.

10. On a scale of 1 — 1,000 (1,000 being a religious experience), where will this semester’s Dive Party rank?

300. Chapel Hill kind of sucks.

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