The Daily Tar Heel

Serving the students and the University community since 1893

Monday December 5th

Editorial: What your mode of transportation says about you

A Chapel Hill transit bus drives down South Road on Sept. 12, 2022.
Buy Photos A Chapel Hill transit bus drives down South Road on Sept. 12, 2022.

You’ve heard of astrological signs. Myer-Briggs personality tests. But what does your choice of transportation at UNC say about you? 

Not all men are created equal, and neither are transportation methods. Are you a car driver with a cyclist rising and scooter moon? Find out in this comprehensive guide to personality by commuting: 

Car

Most people are content with walking on their own two feet or being on two wheels, but you need four wheels to get around and you want people to know it. You operate on an almost delusional hopefulness that there’s a parking spot wherever you’re driving. You are technically always in parking, though, at crosswalks waiting for the never-ending stream of students. 

Electric scooter

You and your need for speed are controversial, but you always hold your head high (above the rest of us common folk pedestrians) and stand your ground … or stand your scooter, rather. But, deep down, you’re insecure about coming off as out-of-shape, so you dress up in your athletic kit before you hop on. Because the rest of us are definitely thinking that you should go play a varsity sport or something. 

Bicycle 

You are the middle child between walking and scootering. You invest medium amounts of effort — enough to put your legs to work by cycling, but not enough to hike across campus. You have a thing for showing off your sweet, sweet ride and how much time you’re saving by not walking! You like the thrill of speeding past everyone else, but, in the back of your mind, you know this could all be taken away from you if someone likes the front wheel of your bike a little too much. Secure that U-lock! 

Electric bicycle

You have a “we are not the same” attitude towards cyclists. You are the word “extra” personified — as extra as those pedals can be since you don’t use them. It probably stemmed from the fact that you always wanted to be the kid who pulled up to school on a Razor scooter.

Moped

Moped owners are who electric bicycle riders would be if they followed through. You live in a happy medium – you reap the benefits of driving, and also the available parking of two-wheeled vehicles. You cruise, and your very audible motor engine sure lets people know.  

Skateboard

You’re the Main Character™ in your own world. You’re a person of few words, but you let the heavy board in your hand exemplify your "chill." You’re subtle like that. 

Walking

You’re a follower. You conform to the herd of thousands of other Rams (or should I say sheep) trudging mindlessly to lecture every day. Glancing at your Apple Watch every other second and watching your step count is your favorite dopamine-inducing activity. You are adamant about your ways; who wants to download TransLoc and learn how the bus works? UNC is walkable for a reason. 

Bus

You’re tech-savvy. You will gladly convert anyone into a devoted follower of the U, NU, RU, U-Name-It. You believe that everyone should take advantage of the buses: they’re huge, free ride-shares after all. Well, everyone except the Saturday night P2P crowd that is. You may be obsessed with getting the best deal, but in terms of budgeting your time, you're pretty careless — you would rather spend the 20 minutes waiting for the bus than spend that same time walking. 

I could spend all day psychoanalyzing my peers based on their transportation choices. At the end of the day, though, it doesn’t matter how you choose to get to class if you don’t even go to begin with.

Happy commuting!

@dthopinion

opinion@dailytarheel.com

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