Kvetching board for March 16, 2012

kvetch:
v.1 (Yiddish) to complain
To the girl in Lenoir who said, “Oh we got a 1-seed? What does that mean?”: Pack your bags immediately and transfer to N.C. State.

To the professor who said you haven’t come around to Roy, you’ve lost my respect.

To the girl next to me in class Googling “how to handle multiple internship offers,” please share your secret to success.

S—t People Never Say: “Man, I wish Larry Drew was here and we were going to the NIT.”
To my drunk suitemate wailing “I hate it!” at 3:30 in the morning, you know what I hate? Being awake at 3:30 a.m. on a Tuesday.

Dear sorority girl, how was your Spring Break trip to Wonkaland? Because you look like an oompa-loompa.

To the guy in Davis on OKCupid.com, you prove that having a 60/40 ratio of companionship in your favor is nothing compared to the help of a mythological god.

To the blonde girl on my cruise from UNC, would it be possible to expand your vocabulary beyond the word ‘literally’?

To the loudest voice in Cobb: You’ve belted “Isn’t She Lovely” every day for the past six months. For the love of all that is holy, please pick a new song.

Why does Yahoo automatically update your Facebook with articles you read? Now everyone knows I secretly stalk Miley.

To the guys playing an acoustic Akon-Katy Perry-Jason DeRulo remix in the Morrison kitchen: no wonder you’re “so lonely.”

Dear North Carolina, why would you designate the most atrocious smelling flower in the entire state as the state flower?

To the girl telling her mom on the phone, “I don’t know what a CV is”: I doubt you’re getting the job.

To the guy flaunting his all-terrain tires outside the UL: this is Chapel Hill, not Chapel Mountain.
To the six shirtless men who, through tarps and sheer ingenuity, transformed their pickup truck bed into a pool, we salute you.

To the guy walking across campus wearing his graduation cap, you are the only person more ready to graduate than me.

Is the “alternative graduation” the new hipster thing to do?

It’s okay, DPS officer. I’d watch YouTube too if I had to sit out on Stadium Drive all night.

To the girl in the Pit wearing tie dye dancing with her eyes closed to the violin players: can I get some of what you’re smoking?

Send your one-to-two sentence entries to
opinion@dailytarheel.com, subject line ‘kvetch.’