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(04/23/02 4:00am)
____simple_html_dom__voku__html_wrapper____>As of last week, the world's fastest computer resides in a Japanese laboratory. While normal people are wondering when exactly this Japanese supercomputer will be sprouting slimy tentacles and eating Tokyo, others are suggesting that we are witnessing the next "Sputnik."
(04/16/02 4:00am)
____simple_html_dom__voku__html_wrapper____>Remember the game "Civilization"? You know, it was the computer game that reinforced the simple concept that everybody's goal in life is to achieve global domination. Besides being addictive and overly focused on military development, the game simulated various aspects integral to the advancement of a civilization, such as scientific research, economic controls and pre-fat Elvis. In the end, "Civilization" gave its players a brief insight into how the world works, sort of.
(04/02/02 5:00am)
____simple_html_dom__voku__html_wrapper____>Every four weeks or so, I must bid a sorrowful farewell to the single natural bodily fixture that I feel most convincingly proves that I am in fact a man. As that time of the month slowly approaches, I reflect on other stereotypical aspects that I could possibly have that would also convey my manhood to the skeptic.
(03/26/02 5:00am)
____simple_html_dom__voku__html_wrapper____>The Cold War was a formidable part of my childhood, and today, it's no more than a mere memory. My guess is that this is the same for almost all '80s babies. Who didn't grow up learning to hate Communism and all its supporters? Didn't everybody learn to condemn Cuba and its leader, even though most Americans couldn't point to where Cuba is on a map, let alone to any one thing that Senor Castro has done in the last 40 years, good or bad?
(03/19/02 5:00am)
____simple_html_dom__voku__html_wrapper____>Back when I was a wee lad, I remember dreaming of the 21st century and thinking, "Wow, what an amazing time to be alive!"
(03/05/02 5:00am)
____simple_html_dom__voku__html_wrapper____>Spring Break is quickly approaching. The SRC is enjoying its busiest time next to the week after New Year's. Meanwhile, two-bit hotel owners in Florida, Mexico and the Bahamas are licking their chops and eagerly anticipating the arrival of throngs of young, gullible and overly-sexed college students. Toss in a dash of Daddy's platinum card and just a pinch of binge drinking, and you get the ultimate mind-numbing Spring Break experience. Calling all alcoholics!
(02/19/02 5:00am)
Oh, the darker days of democracy -- when voter turnout was embarrassingly low, when obscene amounts of corporate dollars funded campaigns and when it was OK for the legislative branch to mettle in simple matters like overruling the outcome of a presidential election.
(02/12/02 5:00am)
____simple_html_dom__voku__html_wrapper____>Today is Election Day. Incidentally, it is also a day to feel proud to be an American, because you can participate in what arguably can be considered as the rawest form of democracy. And that's something Americans should be proud of -- democracy, that is. America advocates it, fights for it, even pays for it.
(02/05/02 5:00am)
____simple_html_dom__voku__html_wrapper____>The other day, I was stood up. Again. This has turned into such a recurring event in my life that I'm beginning to question the wisdom of abolishing arranged marriages. As I am oft to go on the inevitable lonely walk home, I began to think about what it is exactly that makes me such a faithful rider of the get-stood-up express. While I sometimes chalk it up to my sparse leg hair or propensity for graham crackers with good old fashioned processed American cheese, the inevitable conclusion is always the same: Everything about me is too damn moderate.
(01/29/02 5:00am)
As I write this, I shift uncomfortably under the gaze of my sorely neglected juniper bonsai named "Chock L.," who sits peacefully on my dining room table.
(01/08/02 5:00am)
The Christmas season -- a beautiful time of the year when people get together and tell each other how much they care, usually in the form of some mutual exchange of consumer items. And admittedly, the Christmas season has come and gone, but who's to say I can't talk about it anyway?